“Woh mujhse pyar karta hai, ab kya iss baat ki sazaa denge usse?!” – Naira
When Naira uttered these words sitting at a lone corner of a secluded room, shedding tears because Kartik is time and again humiliated for caring for his wife, something inside literally felt for the duo.
For Naira – because it pained her to see Kartik being punished for no reason. For Kartik – because the man is simply being good in every possible way but is been held for the sin of being ‘good’.
Let’s understand a little bit about the character of Kartik Goenka.
1. Concisely, the man is a freak about doing the ‘right’ thing, being with the ‘right’ side and saying the truth. Kartik’s basic problem is that he can’t lie, can’t do anything wrong knowingly and in no way act like a hypocrite. Not even to please anyone he loves. These are his in-built qualities, things that are a part of his personality and defines how and who he is – But Daadi says, these are the results of Naira being in his life!
Question – These are not a result of Naira’s presence, but even if it is, what’s the harm? These aren’t bad qualities, are they? Just because Goenkas are a bunch of hypocrites, their son should also be like that and if not, he is a joru ka ghulam? No wonder Daadi, your own son has forever been your ‘ghulaam‘ and never could say a word against you. We have no problem with the ‘joru ka ghulaam‘ in your house, but definitely has some question we have about the weak spine the ‘maa ka ghulam‘ has.
(It’s not uncommon, probably many viewers will relate to this ‘our son has changed since he got married’ kind of formula in the real world too. Whenever a married man does something not expected by his family, it’s always somehow is the result of his better half’s suggestion, as if the man never had a brain of his own in the very first place)
2. Kartik raises his voice if he sees injustice is done with his wife. He did the same when he felt wrong has been done to his sister. He did the same when he knew how wrong he was to his mother. This guy can stand for the right and has the guts to rectify his own mistakes too! – But Daadi says, it’s all the result of Naira’s brainwashing?
Question – It’s not Naira’s brainwashing. Kartik has enough brain to analyse situation by himself. But even if it is, what’s the harm? Was taking a stand for Naira, Keerti or Swarna wrong? How come? Just because Daadi and her raja beta were too slow to process things? They should eat more badaam then, why blame the poor guy?
3. Kartik Goenka had promised Akshara and Naitik, before even marrying Naira, that he would forever help her with fulfilling her dreams related to the dance academy. He is till date abiding by his word – May be because he loves Naira or may be because he gave his word to his in-laws. Or may be because of both. But Daadi says – because he is a joru ka ghulaam!
Question – Dear Daadi, isn’t a man who helps his wife admirable or stick to his given words and promises respectable? Oh wait! Surely he isn’t! For a lady who dislikes her 60 year old son taking bed tea for his wife, how can she be understanding seeing her 30 year old grandson fulfilling his promises to his wife so dutifully? Fat chance!
If children get accustomed from what they see while growing to a young age, old people also get accustomed to what they see while growing old. And Daadi has never actually seen an ideal and equal husband-wife pair during her years of growing old. If her sons had been, then poor Kartik would have been spared from the blames. Manish Goenka should have taken that bed tea for his wife 25 years ago, then Kartik would not have been given loopsided look for cooking for his wife!
4. Why did Daadi and Manish Goenka never thought to make their daughter independent? Despite her having all those qualities, that Naksh later identified and took a step to enhance. But the Goenkas never appreciates (and Daadi still doesn’t appreciate enough), the success and satisfaction that Keerti gets from her work, aren’t we expecting too much from these set of people to appreciate Naira’s work zone? It’s just probably a spare job for them! People who didn’t think of making their daughter independent, how will they digest the independent thoughts of their independent daughter in law?
5. Here’s what the Goenka family consists of – There’s a Daadi who steals things. A son and father who is spineless and does every stupid thing his mother says. Another father, who to protect his own daughter lies, tries to destroy evidence of a legal case, get one innocent arrested. A bahu who gives absolute feelings of a ‘chugalkhor aunty‘. A daughter who has apparently by mistake killed someone! – And here the Goenkas still have enough guts to stand and question Kartik for being ‘joru ka ghulaam‘? Why? Probably because he has none of the great inherent typical Goenka qualities cited above and these people forget their shameful acts quite fast. For them, regret comes and goes away in jet speed!
6. If your wife is good, have a straight and clean mind, gives you good advice, supports you in times of need and is your equal in everything – What’s the harm in listening to her?
But if your mother is delusional, superstitious, arrogant, judgmental – You should still do as she pleases everytime?
If you ask, we will say, it’s better to be ‘joru ka ghulaam’ of such a wife than being a ‘Maa da ladla‘ of such a mother!
P.S:- It’s really shameful for us to see how in Indian society, men are still degraded by using women as tools. A ‘pati vrata‘ lady is ideal, but a ‘patni vrata‘ man is ‘joru ka ghulaam‘? Why is it so secondary in Indian households for men to be a good and supportive husband and being a son is primary, whereas being a good wife and a good bahu is equally primary? Why it becomes so difficult for a man to be a good son and a good husband at the same time? Why can’t we make life a little easy for them?
A supportive wife isn’t insulted like this….If Naira had made presentations for Kartik, helped in his project, she would have been tagged as a ‘lakshmi‘ for Goenkas. But if Kartik does the same, then the lad becomes a ‘slave to his wife’. Hats off to Bharatiya Parampara! It’s due to this hypocrisy probably why we have less of Kartiks but loads of Daadis and Goenkas in the real world. And that’s sad, really sad.
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